*I have an exam in my majors tomorrow but I saw this post on Facebook suddenly regarding this topic and by impulse, I decided to write this stuff and throw my remaining hopes in the air (haha..)
BLACK IN WHITE.
If you were to imagine a blank clean sheet of bond paper with a tiny smear of ink on it right at the center, would you say that that paper is already dirty?
A black in something white.
For most, the answer would be yes. That smear of black there is an alien on a sheet of pure white and even how small it is compared to the size of the paper, it still makes the paper unusable for ‘paper’ purposes. It is something different, something ugly to look at.
I am that black in a people of ‘pure’ white.
Not only do I mean that metaphorically but I also pertain to that, literally. In my childhood days and even now, I’ve always been bullied because my skin was of darker shade than my peers. At first of course, it hurts (goddamn much). After all, what right do they have to look at me and talk to me as if I am someone inferior just because I happen to have a darker skin than theirs? What right do they possess to make me feel like I cannot be fully accepted just because of my physical appearance? That’s total BS, to be honest. But on and on it went until finally, I learned to accept the truth that no matter what I do, it’s going to be part of what people see in me.
And that’s true. Deny it or not.
In this world, there would always be someone who will judge you base on what they see and they may not tell you that, straight to your face, but at the back of their mind, they’ve already labelled you as different. So I did what Tyrion said. They gave me that name and I made it my own until hearing that didn’t hurt me anymore.
And THAT still made me a black in something white. I did not stay silent but I did not cry in the corner nor get angry whenever they bring that topic. I laughed with them. Unlike those being bullied, I neither retaliated nor did I coward from the battle ground. And on and on they keep on attacking me but they didn’t realize that the bullets they fired were not negated by a bulletproof vest of sarcasm or poker face but instead, it went through air because there was nothing standing there on the first place. Empty. There were no feelings to be guarded because they were not there on the first place.
I am not denying the fact that I have darker skin. I am simply accepting it. I have realized it was part of what I am and what I’ve become. It is not a flaw which I should be ashamed of nor should it be something I am embarrassed with when criticized. So yeah.. That’s simply that.
To be a smear of ink on a clean sheet of paper may be generally dirty but few others would say it is the start of something entirely new and unexpected— no matter what that something is.
Let me end this by quoting again my favorite character in Game of Thrones:
Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like an armor. And it can never be used to hurt you. – Tyrion Lannister
*cr. to the owners for the pics